


The Pros and Cons of Parisian Summers

by Regarklipop



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: M/M, and Nicky making emoji eyes at Joe, there is sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:35:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26112742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Regarklipop/pseuds/Regarklipop
Summary: They're in a fifth floor apartment in the 3rd with no air conditioning in July and the fact that Nicky has to suffer through that and his husband being too handsome is an unreasonable request.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 26
Kudos: 270





	The Pros and Cons of Parisian Summers

**Author's Note:**

> Given that it's nearing the end of summer we could probably call this late, but I love summer so time is meaningless. This fic is essentially a love letter to Yusuf Al-Kaysani.
> 
> I have no idea if Yusuf loves baths but I love baths so that's the extent of my character analysis on that. This entire thing is a work of self-indulgence what's up. 
> 
> Fun Fact: Cum is one of the worst things for your drain, so avoid cum in the shower.
> 
> Inspired by: https://hachinana87.tumblr.com/post/626793043164561408/so-hot

**Con: It’s hot**

It’s July 2nd and all Nicky can think about as the temperature ticks up and up is how much he would rather not be in Paris. The Airbnb he’d secured with Joe in the 3rd is lovely, but with no portable fan and no air-conditioning (on top of being a fifth floor walk-up), the temperature seems to be stuck somewhere between a simmer and a rolling boil.

They’re here because the two of them, alongside Andy and Nile, have decided that forgiveness is less painful than not seeing Booker, and if things go well, Nile will be able to meet Quynh, and Andy can start her reunion tour with her wife after the two of them hash out everything.

Unfortunately, neither Andy nor Nile are going to be in the city for another two weeks, and it’s left Nicky and Joe at loose ends.

(When Andy and Nile do get there, they will likely be staying elsewhere. Probably, Nicky thinks enviously, somewhere with air conditioning.)

The apartment itself has the classic tall ceilings and small kitchen. There are two lovely bedrooms with comfortable beds, and while Nicky had not loved the fact that taking up his guard spot became impossible when the door was on the opposite side of the room to the enormous window, when Joe had closed the shutters and the curtains, Nicky’d relented and tucked himself between Joe and the door.

Not that it mattered in the end. The heat had chased them out of the room within three days of arriving. Now they sleep on a futon in a side room off the dining room (ostensibly the living room), where the door shares the same corner as the windows. They shift the futon and side tables to the wall beside the windows, allowing them to leave the windows open to the cool courtyard breeze, giving them a chance of actually sleeping soundly, and allowing Nicky to lay between entry points and Joe.

Despite the newer, more temperature friendly setup, Nicky still deeply ponders skipping the Saints and the Madre di Dio and getting on a direct line to God to talk about air conditioning and Europe’s lack of it.

**Pro: Fewer clothes**

One of the nicer outcomes of the heat has been that Joe is down to his boxer briefs and necklace 60% of the time that they’re in the apartment. The only reason it isn’t higher is that the other 40% of the time, he’s naked in the bath.

It’s hard for Nicky (please Joe stop laughing yes it’s a double entendre but please), emotionally and spiritually, to have to see his husband in such a state. More often then not, Joe is laid out on the wood floor on a yoga mat he’d found in the closet. Sometimes he naps, sometimes he sketches, but the end result is that miles and miles of Joe’s luminescent skin are left uncovered. A glimpse of him dries Nicky’s mouth out and has him sweating more than even the heat can explain.

This is all so difficult for Nicky because-

**Con: It’s basically too hot to have sex ******

Not impossible mind you, they’ve definitely had it, but the fact that cuddling is untenable in the heat has meant that sex is mostly happening in the evenings. This is unfair, because a sleepy, warm, relaxed Joe is Nicky’s favourite Joe (not that he has a ranking list or anything. All Joes are his favourite Joes) and the platonic ideal of Joe in that state happens to occur at around 2 in the afternoon, when the heat reaches it’s peak and Joe has set aside whatever he’s reading or drawing, and is lightly napping with the curtains closed.

Nicky’s eyes always trace the slice of sunlight from where the curtains don’t quite meet, his gaze falling alongside the light as it dips across Joe’s lower back or over his belly depending on how he’s fallen asleep. Nicky listens for how his husband’s breath sighs out whenever he shifts to get comfortable again.

It is, as Booker would say, insupportable.

**Pro: Wet Joe**

The fact that Nicky must suffer through a nearly nude Joe is mitigated by one thing. Joe, who already loves baths more than most people love anything in their lives, is now taking two baths a day as a way to deal with the heat.

He always showers first, rinses out the tub, and then runs a bath, bemoaning the fact that Europeans have mostly figured out keeping the toilet separate from the bathroom, but haven’t managed to come to grips with having the ability to run a bath and wash off at the same time without getting the bath water dirty.

Joe runs tepid baths right now, the cool water a relief from the rest of the apartment. He also leaves the bathroom door open so that whenever Nicky walks by, he gets to see his husband with his arms up on the sides of the tub, his book hung up over the towel rack, and his gaze sleepily watching Nicky go by.

It takes Nicky three baths and Joe giving him a look that is so disappointed it makes Nicky squirm before Nicky realises that he is an idiot. He strips off his shorts, and nearly jumps into the bath with Joe, splashing water everywhere and reveling in Joe’s laugh and call of ‘finally!’. Nicky hums as he settles down between Joe's legs, leaning up and chastising Joe for not saying anything as they start to trade kisses. Joe tells him he’d wanted to see how long it would take Nicky to realise.

His husband is a genius. Shift in location? Suddenly not too hot to have sex.

They will have to shower again.

**Con(?): Summer Joe**

Nicky is not built for summer heat in any way, shape, or form. He likes his hoodies and cool breezes, likes winter foods, and he loves cuddling with Joe. This hot apartment is really putting a damper on his style.

Joe, on the other hand, thrives in summer. It’s as though he has made a pact with the summer sun to only ever show him in the same light that great artists spend their lives trying to capture. It leaves Nicky in the unfortunate position of a) wanting to see his husband thrive during his favourite time of year and b) understanding that doing any activities of any kind, anywhere mean that Nicky will be so hot and sweaty he’ll want to die.

This problem is solved because Nicky is incapable of saying no to Joe. When Joe suggests they go to the Marché des Enfants Rouge the next day, Nicky agrees, thinking that at least sunburns don’t tend to stick unless they’re really bad.

When morning arrives, the temperature is already rising. Nicky, however, has made peace with his future perspiration, and is instead committed to enjoying the day with Joe. They’d put together a list of things they needed the night before, and even if they can’t find one of those portable Swedish barbecues, they can still put together a cold meal, find a park, and have dinner together on the grass.

It’s when Joe wanders out of the bedroom that Nicky is reminded of how powerful his husband is in summer.

Joe’s skin glows. Joe's skin glows, and not only has he been able to find the products he likes for his hair, but two weeks with nowhere to be means he's had the time to try different styles. His curls shine, looping and spiraling and emphasizing the warmth of the brown eyes set below them.

The linen shirt Joe’s wearing is just shy of being see through, but it clings when Joe twists the right way, buttons done up as if they had been an afterthought. When Joe reaches up to put his sunglasses on his head, the effect is devastating to Nicky’s psyche.

The shorts are new, Nicky thinks to himself, panicking. Joe has stuck to light summer pants for as long as light summer pants have existed as an option. Now he has jean shorts on that end just above his knee. This is fine, Nicky thinks, but Nicky’s traitor brain reminds him of last night, when he’d placed kisses on those calves before taking Joe apart with his mouth. He feels like a weird pervert as his brain continues to run the footage of last night’s encounter.

Joe’s sandals don’t register, Nicky’s brain stuck like a record on ‘shorts, shorts, shorts, shorts.’ He doesn’t have any primary brain function, so he falls back on secondary function: what to do when his brain is trying to prepare itself for an emergency or a big kick of adrenaline.

Nicky reaches into his bag to pull out Joe’s favourite flavour of gum, holding it out to Joe and causing the man to give him a strange look before suddenly smiling.

“Ah, hayati, I didn’t think today was going to be such a mission for you. I’d forgotten your hatred of the sun,” which… sort of correct. Nicky doesn’t hate the sun; he hates the astronomical sun.

But Joe… Joe is the sun that Nicky ecstatically orbits around. The light of his life and warmth to his days. Joe is his closest companion and everything that Nicky loves in a person.

Nicky starts frantically pulling on the signal cord of the bus that is his brain. He would like it to stop now please. His brain is trying to make poetry happen and that is the way madness lies.

Then Joe cups Nicky’s face, leans in, and kisses him. Nicky’s hands automatically come up to the back of his husband’s neck, absently noting that Joe has forgone wearing his rings today, and instead they are looped on his necklace.

Joe picks the packet of gum out of Nicky’s hands and pops two pieces into his mouth, tucking the pack back into Nicky’s bag before clasping Nicky’s hand with his and guiding him out the door.

Oh, how lovely it is to fall in love every day, Nicky thinks.

**Pro: It’s definitely not too hot to have sex**

They don’t eat too much when it's this hot, but they eventually need to go get stuff like gunpowder green tea and mint so Joe can make mint tea. After all these years, Nicky still doesn’t really understand why someone would want to drink hot tea during the summer, but Joe said he’d figure out how to make it iced for Nicky, and going out to get some ingredients while the love of his immortal life takes a bath is certainly not a task that registers on his “difficult things I’ve had to do in my life” or even “annoying things from the past three days” (which are, in no particular order, having to unstick himself from a plastic chair, forcing himself not to jump Joe because it was too hot, and sweating through his shirt so badly in public that he’s sure people thought he had a glandular problem).

There was a storm the night before, so the heat’s not too bad as Nicky heads to Monoprix. Despite the cooler weather, the city is emptier than usual as people leave Paris for the beaches and their summer vacations. It won’t be until the end of August that the city fills up again, and Nicky is thankful for that as he enters the (blessedly) cool and barren grocery store. He drifts through the aisles but doesn’t get much more than enough for a salad and some precooked items that he and Joe can eat without even looking at the stove.

He slinks over to the freezer section with the intention of standing in front of an open freezer for a moment before he heads to the cash, but he ends up spotting a Korean popsicle brand that Joe loves, giving him an excuse to fully immerse himself in the cold while he pretends to agonise over flavour choices.

Joe loves mango and honeydew; Nicky slips two boxes of each into his basket and goes to pay.

He wanders back to the apartment, hoofing it up the five flights of stairs and through the front door. He drops the groceries off on the kitchen counter before finding and ripping open the box of mango popsicles. He grabs one, and when he finds Joe on the futon, post bath and in boxer briefs and a button up shirt with only one button done up, he feels his world collapse, re-orient, and then expand again.

The way his love’s eyes light up when they settle on Nicky’s face is a balm. To this day he considers the wonder that allows him to love and be loved by this man when so many others have no one.

“Did you buy popsicles?” Joe’s eyes have zeroed in on the packet in Nicky’s hand.

“I found that Korean brand you really like at the store,” he moves into the room and passes the popsicle to Joe, who tears it open and gleefully exclaims when he realises the flavour.

“Ah Nicky, you’re a dream! You even got mango, my favourite,” Nicky recalls Nile saying something about how ‘praise is a straight shot of serotonin to my brain’. He understands. Joe’s words make Nicky feel like someone turned on an ultra bright light inside of him. They make him feel like he’s vibrating at the same speed as an atom.

“There’s honeydew as well. I’ll pop them in the freezer. Is salad okay for tonight? I can throw together something else,” Joe is shaking his head.

“Salad is fine. I’ll put the groceries away and make tea later. Did you want to take a shower? The tub is clean,” Nicky nods, already moving towards the bathroom while stripping out of his shirt.

He’s in and out of the shower in minutes, and when he’s as dressed as he’s going to willingly be given the circumstances, he heads back to the living room where Joe is, finding him nearly where Nicky’d left him.

Joe has changed sides on the couch while Nicky was in the shower. Clearly finished with his popsicle and putting the groceries away, he's slid across the small futon to the position away from the window and door, leaving the space open to Nicky. While Nicky could sit down right away, he takes a moment to take in the room and appreciate the sight of Joe that he’d left behind so he could shower.

The shirt Joe’s wearing is starting to slip to one side, and Nicky tracks a drop of water that is slowly making its way down Joe’s neck. When the droplet disappears into the hair on Joe’s chest, Nicky’s eyes continue the journey, stopping when they reach his love’s nipple, hard as the water evaporates from his skin and cools him.

“See something you like?” Joe is still focusing on his book, but his lips have tipped upwards.

“Maybe,” Nicky says but he’s already moving to stand before Joe, and as Nicky leans over the other man, his hand slips beneath the other panel of Joe’s shirt, allowing Nicky to rest his palm just beneath Joe’s arm, his thumb gently rubbing back and forth across his husband’s nipple.

“Hmmmmm…” Joe says, his arms coming up so he can reel Nicky in for a kiss, his book abandoned in his lap.

The scratch of Joe’s beard across Nicky’s face has Nicky deepening the kiss, finally getting one knee up onto the couch so he can balance better. His hand scrabbles for the book, finally picking it up and placing it on the small table next to the bed.

“Are you sure it isn’t too hot for you Nico?” Joe says when the kiss breaks off. It is too cheeky by half given what they’ve started, but Nicky intends to fix that. His lips are already drifting to his husband’s ear, slowly making his way down Joe’s neck, gentle kisses mixed with ones that involve teeth and tongue.

By the time he finds his way down Joe’s chest, Joe’s own hands have slipped around Nicky’s back, rubbing up and down his spine, occasionally slipping a finger beneath the waistband of Nicky’s briefs.

“Nicolo,” Yusuf sighs, and if that isn’t a one hit total knock-out, nothing is.

They go slow, letting what they’re doing stay lazy. Yusuf jumps a little when Nico pinches his nipple, returning the favour by tipping Nicolo down onto the couch before climbing carefully between Nico’s legs, lying down so that his hips can languidly thrust against Nicolo’s.

They make out for minutes, not getting much more naked than they already are. Finally, Nico grabs their lubricant off the side table, letting Yusuf up so that he can pull Nicolo’s briefs down. Yusuf then grins as he drags one loose fist up and down Nicolo’s dick, causing shivers to ripple down Nico’s body as his hips thrust into the loose circle of Yusuf’s hand.

“ _Caro_ ,” Nico says, breathlessly, barely getting it together enough to lightly smack Yusuf’s arm when the man chuckles.

Yusuf responds by pulling down his own underwear. He grabs Nico’s hand, squirts some lube on it, and then guides Nicolo’s hand down to where their dicks are, gently wrapping it around both of them and guiding Nico to pump his hand. Yusuf only breaks eye contact when his eyes close, his breath hissing through his teeth when Nicolo tightens his grip and starts to move faster, his thumb occasionally stopping to rub under the head of Yusuf’s dick.

His body is on fire and he is so grateful to give and receive this gift.

It’s sweaty, of course. Not that sex has ever been anything other than sweaty, but the heat of the room makes everything slicker, faster. Nico can’t take his eyes off of Yusuf because the man is shimmering with sweat, his bottom lip is caught between his teeth, and his hips stuttering as Nico continues to pump his fist around them.

It ends when Nico gets the knuckle of his other hand up behind his love’s balls, pushing into the skin behind them. Yusuf’s head tips back and he comes with a shout before he collapses onto his elbows above Nicolo, kissing him desperately as Nico continues to move his hand over his own dick. It takes another minute, but before his eyes close from the pleasure they are filled with the image of his love’s face.

They spend minutes afterwards continuing to kiss in the afternoon light. The temperature is cool enough that if Joe or Nicky deign to go get a washcloth to clean up, they could probably pull the futon out and cuddle for a while. As it is, they are in no rush to do anything.

“We should go to a museum tomorrow,” Joe says, his lips pressed to Nicky’s collarbone.

“Which one? We’ve been to all of them multiple times,”

“I haven’t decided yet. Tomorrow’s not a Monday or Tuesday, right?”

“No. Every museum in Paris is at your disposal,” Nicky is starting to feel the unavoidable need for a nap, but whines when Yusuf suddenly slips out of his arms.

“Come along, tesoro, I’m running another bath if you’re interested?” Nicky perks up, ignoring Joe’s soft laughter as Nicky gets to his feet, Joe so easily pulling on the thread that connects his heart to Nicky’s, Nicky helpless to do anything but follow.

“I’ll wash your back, we’ll take a nap, and then we’ll make dinner,” Nicky loves the sound of that.

End.

**Author's Note:**

> me @ me: this won't be longer than 1500 words
> 
> me @ me: what_makes_you_haha.mp3
> 
> hit me up on tumblr at centurydependent


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